Friday, August 14, 2009

Repugnant... Have You Ever Danced with the Devil in the Pale Moonlight?

Yeah... Me neither. But I worked for the devil for a year and a half. And let me tell you... It was hell.

So I was laid off almost 2 months ago from The Seventh Circle of Hell. While it was truly a nightmare, it paid the bills. We had been hearing for a while that there were going to be budget cuts and then, low and behold, out of the blue (like 3 days before the new fiscal year started) The Devil herself* calls me into her office and tells me it's my last day.

The Devil herself

During this meeting, she informed me that she had laid off one person from each team because of budget cuts and that she'd been losing sleep and feeling sick over the whole situation. LIES! Only 3 people were laid off (all black; all non-conformist to the 7th Circle culture). But here's the kicker; she knew for over a month that she was going to lay us off. She told one of the other people they were getting laid off because he "just got married" and she thought it was important for him to "be able to prepare." WTF? I'm not married but I have rent and bills too! What kind of evil ass bullsh*t is that?


So on my last day, as I exited the building, I took this:

Hey, I figured they'd given me a figurative middle finger. The least I could do was give them a literal one

I then uploaded it to my work fun photo album on facebook as the final picture in my album of shenanigans at the 7th circle. Turns out that some douchebag (one of the people on my friends list who works there) told La Diabla and she, in turn, tells my former team members to tell me to take it down.

HA!... In your dreams, babe...

So, yesterday I happened to be up the street from my old job and had a gift for one of my former teammates. I decided to pop in for just a second to drop it off (hell is hot and I've never been one for heat). After ignoring the insistence of the people at the front desk to sign in (I don't f*cking work there anymore. I refuse to follow their dumbass rules) I make my way to my former team's room where none other than J-Dubb aka La Diabla is conversing with one of my former team members.


Of Course I ignore her (because I don't talk to people that I don't like) and after a brief salutation to my former teammate, I begin writing a note for my other teammate for whom I brought the gift, as she was off yesterday. As I'm writing, La Diabla says "Uhhhhhh... Hellooooo?" As if I'm obligated to greet her.

I turned around slowly... Gave her the stink eye**... And proceeded to say "Wassup." When I was done writing, I said goodbye to my former teammate and immediately left the building.

My little sister, Sweet D, cracking an egg of her 16-year-old wisdom on me, said that I should have been more polite. She said that even though J-Dubb is a royal pain in my soul, I should've been the bigger person. But I say, I WAS the bigger person. You have no IDEA how many cleverly crafted awful, hurtful and downright mean things I could've said to her. I'm somewhat of a word genius, if you will.

Anyway, I won't be anywhere near that hellhole for a while... Familiarity breeds contempt. And absence makes the heart grow fonder... Lol

"People say I think that I'm better than them... But I don't really trip... 'Cause I'm better than them..."

*I'm not referring to J-Dubb as the devil because she's white and has blue eyes. I'm referring to her as the devil because she's in charge. And if my memory serves me correctly, isn't the devil the head honcho in hell?

**Not familiar with the stink eye? This is mine:

A video... Of happier times... Although, in hell... Happiness is relative... ENJOY!